My New Normal

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This is my newest little treasure. His name is Gabriel and I completely adore him. I am so blessed to have a second healthy little boy to call my own. He arrived March 28th and since then we’ve been adjusting to life with two little boys. (Our oldest is three). It really has been an adjustment though, I’m not gonna lie.

Sometimes I feel like I shouldn’t talk about the challenges because I know that there are many more moms out there with much bigger challenges- with more than two young children, or raising children on their own, or dealing with children who are sick. Compared to all of that – I really don’t have anything to complain about (but of course I still do). The things I complain about are small in the big picture I know, almost humorous (after the fact) but at the same time they are my new daily reality I am learning to live with and it’s just that — NEW. And I choose to write about them because I know there must be other parents who can relate and if nothing else can find some comfort in knowing it’s not just them. (I know I do when I read other people’s experiences).

So here is my list of (trivial) complaints/annoyances/sources of frustration that are now a part of my daily reality as a mom of two little boys (3 years and 2 months) – Maybe you can relate and laugh/sympathize along with me.

1. My three-year old never stops talking. Ever. I’m not even exaggerating one little bit. From the moment his eyes open in the morning till the moment they finally close at night it is one CONSTANT stream of words – mostly questions which require a response. (Because he WILL keep asking until you acknowledge him and he WILL get louder and louder if you try to ignore him). Like for example in the last 3 minutes that I have been trying to write this sentence he has asked about 10 questions which I have had to stop and answer. Now he’s been like this for a little while, but I find it more exhausting now since I have a little baby needing my attention constantly as well. (I guess it also doesn’t help that I get an average of 5-6 hours of sleep a night and never in one big, uninterrupted chunk, what’s that like again?!?). I try to tell myself that this is just how he learns and it’s a good thing (it really is, he’s a smart kid) but in the moments when I’m trying to concentrate on something or finish a task or tend to his little brother…It gets to be a little much.

2. Now more than ever, there is very little time in a day where someone is not needing something from me. The baby needs to nurse every 2-3 hours and in between that he needs changed, burped, rocked, put to sleep, or entertained and when he’s finally sleeping (without me needing to bounce his bouncy chair continuously) my oldest needs lunch or a snack or to go poop on the potty or to have his nose wiped or hands washed or needs me to play with him…and of course answer about a million questions. (Okay, I admit “a million” might be exaggerating, but only slightly).

3. 80% of my thinking each day is spent on one or all of these topics: poop and pee (how many times the baby has pooped, does my toddler need to pee/poop, I’ve had to go to the bathroom for over an hour!), eating (I’m hungry, the baby’s hungry, my toddler is hungry), sleep (the baby needs to sleep, how I don’t sleep anymore, how I wish my toddler still took a nap etc.) Which means I only have 20% of my thoughts left to spend on everything else in my life. No wonder I feel scatterbrained most of the time.

4. I can’t do anything without being interrupted. Ever. This includes going to the bathroom, trying to eat a meal and writing a blog post. 😉 (Oh- and multi-tasking is not an option anymore – I have been bouncing Gabe in his bouncy chair, sticking his soother in his mouth every time it falls out and wiping Ezra’s runny nose all while writing this post). So you’ll forgive any grammatical errors/understand if parts of this post don’t even make sense!

5. Going out anywhere is an exhausting ordeal. Trying to get myself looking presentable, both of the boys clean and ready and packing for a number of possible scenarios takes forever and so means even less sleep for me. And even when I wake up very early and have tried to lay things out the night before – we still never leave on time. I know people (obviously without children) say, “I don’t know why they’re always late, they only have two kids – just wake up earlier!” – I am here to tell you, I don’t know how or why, but it STILL doesn’t work.

I read a devotional online today for moms about not comparing yourself to other moms or trying to “live up” to their standards. God created each of us uniquely and with different strengths. I am trying to remember this truth when I feel overwhelmed or guilty because I can’t do “it” (whatever that may be) like so-and-so. I would like to say that I never complain and I am just cherry all the time because I have two adorable children, but it’s just not true. So I just decided to post some “reality” for you today. It is what it is. I do the best I can and that’s what matters.

“Comparison is the thief of joy.” Just be true to you and it will make whatever you’re dealing with a little big easier.

I think I will stop here for today. First because I think that’s enough complaining for today and secondly because the baby is stirring, my oldest needs his nose wiped and I’m hungry.

So until next time…

Enjoy today, whatever it looks like.

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1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. GILBERT KENYA
    May 21, 2014 @ 10:28:32

    What a powerful and honest account of the daily “tribulations” of a young mother! Doesn’t the experience of bringing up young “little things” make us respect and love our parents even more?
    I can clearly identify with most of the things you have written since I have a menace called Ray in the house, I don’t wanna call him a terrorist coz he does actually terrorize things in the house, but I am always amazed by the capacity of toddlers to ask so many questions in a day and never giving up until they are answered! Ray is always all over me I can hardly manage to do anything uninterrupted in the house.
    For the last few weeks I have been indoors, I have had first hand experience of what a mother’s daily diary looks like. If Ray alone can be overwhelming, I can only try to imagine how you even manage to write! Being a mother of young kids is not only a fulltime job but a very demanding one at that. Indeed if evolution were to be true, mothers could be having several hands by now! Kudos to all responsible mothers.

    Reply

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